Prickly Post

Stamps – I never really got the point of stamp collecting, at least not just your bog-standard penny blacks and the like. But some of them are gorgeous and I reckon I could be tempted to engaged in a little philately  (is that right?) where animals and plants are concerned … and then, what comes along but the perfect vehicle for the budding philatelist … a hedgehog stamp!

Out in March, the Royal Mail is celebrating UK mammals. And while the set contains such diversions as a bat, otter, water vole, and dormouse, by far the most significant contribution comes in the form of a hedgehog.

Now you might think I would obviously say that – pure hyperbole – but I base my praise of the hedgehog stamp in sound economics. The British Hedgehog Preservation Society has teamed up with the UK’s leading producer of first day covers to make an official hedgehog first day cover – and there is more …

Not just the first day cover, but a BHPS postmark …

And not just that either, a limited number are personally signed by BHPS patron (tv personality, adventurer, writer and every-bloody-ones favourite) Ben Fogle … what is it about Ben Fogle … at a BHPS trustees meeting there is pretty much a minutes silence of quivering reverence when we acknowledge the £449 he raised for doing a little run – yet not even the remotest hint of a quiver when I point out I raised £423 getting a hedgehog tattoo.

Where was I … so, not only can you buy hedgehog first day covers, but you can also buy ones touched by the soon to be beatified Ben (but it will cost you an additional £10).

If you are so moved to join in the collective Ben and hedgehog worship, please order through the link on the BHPS website – this will ensure that 40% of every sale goes straight to the society. The covers cost £11.95 unsigned or £22.95 with the possibility that a drop of Ben’s sweat might just have evaporated on the stamp.

You can also call Buckingham Covers direct on 01303 278 137 stating you would like 40% of the sale price to come to the Society.

Hedgehog Groundhog?

Yesterday – 2nd February – is a day that has grown in significance for hedgehog lovers all across the USA as the nineteenth century tradition of Groundhog Day morphs into Hedgehog Day. It is a day that has attracted many appellations, Candlemas of Imbolc for example. And it is a special time of year in the northern hemisphere as it marks the halfway point between the winter and spring solstice. For pre-industrial societies this would be seen as a significant turning point for those enduring the privations of the leanest months of the year.

Groundhog Day is perhaps most recognised from the delightfully deep and funny film of that name starring Bill Murray (you might have to trust me on the deepness, just watch it with a Buddhist!) in which he plays a tv weatherman forever stuck in a repeating day, having to present the event at Gobblers Knob … I had better explain. The idea behind Groundhog Day is that if the animal casts a shadow when it is yanked from its slumber, this indicates that a further six weeks of winter are to follow.

But where did it come from? Well, there is an old British poem that includes:

If Candlemas be fair and bright,
Come, Winter, have another flight;
If Candlemas brings clouds and rain,
Go Winter, and come not again.

According to one history of Groundhog Day, conquering Roman legions brought the tradition of a hedgehog being the key player in this act to Germany where it took root and followed the earliest settlers to the New World. But the absence of hedgehogs required a replacement – and that is where the rather un-hedgehog-like groundhog came into the equation. So was born the legend of Punxsutawney Phil, whose ceremonial appearance now attracts tens of thousands of visitors to his burrow on Gobbler’s Knob.

Such an important date is this newly minted Hedgehog Day that it is has become the most significant day in the spiky calendar, with at least two people I have met having arranged their weddings to coincide with the hedgehogs.

But has it the remotest grounding in fact? Advocates have spoken of the writing of Plinius (Pliny the Elder) in support of the story. Plinius repeats a story first recorded by Aristotle claiming that the hedgehog does have prophetic powers over the weather. Apparently it is possible to discern the direction of the weather by looking at the way hedgehogs establish their nests. They are alleged to have two entrances, and block up the one that points towards incoming inclemency. So there is at least some ancient connection between hedgehogs and the weather … but still no evidence that there was ever a hedgehog day in classical times.

And it is not as if there is any agreement on when hedgehog day actually is. For example, in New Zealand it falls on 10th September; Ogden Water, near Halifax in West Yorkshire have chosen 5th November to call hedgehog day; Newcastle-under-Lyme Borough council held a hedgehog day on 10th August; the Isle of White declared that the 17th June was National Hedgehog Day and on top of that we have the British Hedgehog Preservation Society’s Hedgehog Awareness week, that runs in early May each year. Strikes me that we should make every day hedgehog day.

Does all this diminish American Hedgehog Day as an idea? Well not really, every ceremonial occasion is a human construct. Every tradition or religious festival, whether it is Easter, Eid, Diwali or Yom Kippur is just made up by people at some point in history. Traditions are important components of societal glue, and I like the fact that we are at liberty to create our own. And then it will be down to the wonderful power of natural selection of the fittest – some ideas will, like species, fall by the wayside as inadequate in the face of newer, fitter models. Perhaps Hedgehog Day will take on a life of it’s own. Perhaps in years to come there will be archaeologists investigating the roots of the dominant, hedgehog-based, religion, excavating the holy site of Gobbler’s Knob. Perhaps I have been spending too long among these people.

Freedom for the Texas hedgehogs?

More than 27,000 animals are now the legal custody of the city of Arlington, Texas, following their seizure from U.S Global Exotics following a judgement on the 30th January.

I have been kept in touch with the goings on in Arlington, Texas, thanks to the wonderful folk at the Hedgehog Welfare Society, as well as friends on Facebook.

Just over three weeks ago I posted the story – about the company U.S Global Exotics and its exposure as a desperately cruel enterprise thanks to the enterprising investigations of an undercover operative from PETA.

And now, homes are being sought for the 600 or so hedgehogs. One of my facebook friends (Vicki McLean) is on her way to Texas to get as many as she can and help re-home them. She has already been busy helping care for them.

Yet again, I admire the dedication that hedgehogs attract – whether it is the amazing hedgehog and wildlife rehabilitators here in the UK, or those who expend enormous resources on vulnerable hedgehogs in the alien space of the USA.

Why do hedgehogs attract such love and attention? Partly it is because they are the only wild animal that we can easily nurture – they ‘allow’ us by dint of their behaviour when threatened to care for them. But there is something else (other than the fact that they are darn cute) – and that is the gateway they provide to a touch of the wild. So this is my concern about the domestication of the hedgehog. What makes a hedgehog so special is its wild heart … so please – when these ones are rescued – can some thought be given to allowing them to keep what makes them so very very special.

Bankers steal hedgehogs

Google alerts can be wonderful – through them I have found reviews of my book, references to articles I have written, and, of course, lots and lots of stuff about hedgehogs. And this morning, a new one … one that, if I had not finished my porridge, would have left me spluttering gluey oats into my beard and across the computer screen.

Who do you think is in need of a social networking facility? Which portion of society has been so left out that it needs its own platform to share and hold e-hands across the vast distances of cyber-space?

Bankers and hedge-fund managers … and they have taken the url …. oh, this bit makes me feel more than a little sick …. hedgehogs.net …. and what is even more galling about this is that I missed the url … and it is in the hands of a bunch of people who are managing to do more than anyone else to further the destruction of the lives and habitats of my beloved creatures.

What can I do, other than to grind my teeth and shake my fist in futile fury at the computer?

ps – I remembered a book review I wrote that explains a little why the very rich are so linked to the destruction of the hedgehog (well, I don’t think I actually mention hedgehogs in the review … but you get the point). The book was ‘How the rich are destroying the earth’ by Herve Kempf.

Why the exotic pet trade is wrong and undercover investigations are so important

More than 27,000 animals, including over 730 hedgehogs, have been seized from exotic pet dealer in Arlington, Texas. The company, US Global Exotics, was raided following a seven month undercover investigation by the animal rights organisation, PETA.

In what is thought to be the largest seizure of animals in the US, the range of species found is staggering: wallabies, sloths, ringtail lemurs, kinkajous, coatimundis, agoutis, hedgehogs, chinchillas, hamsters, gerbils, rats, mice, flying squirrels, guinea pigs, sugar gliders, prairie dogs, ferrets, snakes, lizards, turtles, frogs, spiders, crabs, and scorpions.

Many of these animals have been collected from the wild and transported to the dealer. The undercover recordings on the PETA website show that US Global Exotics was a company that appeared not to care about the welfare of the animals. There are some very grisly and gruesome images, so be warned before looking at the video.

Friends of mine, who I met at the Rocky Mountain Hedgehog Show while researching my book, have been helping to clear up the mess by taking the hedgehogs into care. But now the Hedgehog Welfare Society needs help and money so they can re-home the hedgehogs.

And this is where I get annoyed about the whole exotic pet industry. The hedgehog pet keepers I met were wonderful and kind if, to be honest, a little eccentric. They love their hedgehogs, they care for them without fault. But their wonderful care helps perpetuate the exotic pet industry. They encourage people to think that it is okay to have these animals as pets and this means that other people, less well-equipped to be nurturing (or simply downright mean and stupid), think it is okay  to have an exotic animal as a companion.

I don’t know what the answer is, but while there is big money to be made from the exotic pet trade, there are always going to be people, like US Global Exotics, who will take advantage of lax enforcement of animal welfare legislation to try and squeeze extra profit from the bodies of these animals.

And if it were not for the intrepid investigator, none of this would have made the news – and the animals would continue to be abused. So all praise to the brave and wonderful undercover stars – who have to keep their light well and truly hidden. And if you are ever tempted to buy an exotic pet – try and find out what it went through before it got to you before making a decision.

Self-promotion

To some this may seem unsavoury, but to me, it is a necessary component of life … self-promotion. I think that I was raised to shun such extreme behaviour, but somewhere along the line I shed the middle-class reserve (probably around the time I learnt to think for myself, and realised that ‘if you don’t ask, you don’t get’).

So, here are just a few of the reviews that A Prickly Affair and The Hedgehog’s Dilemma (one and the same) received … and if you are so moved, please go to Amazon and write more.
Jeanette Winterson
“the most glorious mad book… a charming book and will take your mind off everything.”

New Scientist
“…an autobiographical yarn … that is at once humorous, touching and obsessive… An oddly satisfying read.”

The Guardian
“…unfailingly entertaining… Ultimately it’s a book about our relationship with hedgehogs as much as it is about hedgehogs themselves.” “Save a hedgehog and you might just save the world.”

Jay Griffiths
“This is an utterly charming book, it is funny and gently serious.”

Libby Purves (Midweek)
“The perfect antidote to the economic crisis.”

The Spectator
“This is a useful and entertaining book, and unsentimental.”

The Daily Telegraph
“Hugh Warwick, an otherwise normal father-of-two…”

Oxford Times
“You end up learning an enormous amount about hedgehogs without really noticing, and laugh quite a lot, too.”

Hay Book Festival programme
“A truly eccentric global story of hog lore.”

LA Times
“There’s more than a whiff of the legendary naturalist Gerald Durrell here — his humor, his affection and his never-ending curiosity.”

Shocking behaviour

I feel compelled by the confessional nature of the blog (it really does feel like some creepy pale-skinned man-in-a-frock reads everything I write) to admit to doing something shocking today …

I am sure I am not alone, as an author, in going into bookshops and helping with the arrangements of displays. There is the familiar feeling of disappointment when I find A Prickly Affair not face out at eye-level … but as I am sure that is just an accident, I like to show willing by helping out and rearranging things.

So, that is okay? Isn’t it?

Then there is the business of signing books … now, I don’t just wander around bookshops signing my copies without asking (though there have been incidents where people have been found signing away in obscure volumes that might, or might not, be theirs) – I ask, and usually feel a little embarrassed about asking. But it is an important thing to do – not only do people feel they are getting something a little more special (though what could be more special than A Prickly Affair anyway?) with the scribble … but there is the seriously important fact that once the books have been signed, they cannot be returned.

If only I had spent a year running around the bookshops in America to stop them returning the far better title US edition – The Hedgehog’s Dilemma … got my royalty statement yesterday – ow, that hurts reading those numbers …

So, moving books and signing them – ok?

But then, while signing the books on the display in Waterstones, Oxford, today, I did something that reveals the true depths I will sink too … my book was on a display – manager’s choice …  four stars out of a possible five and a great selling point too … and what did I do? I coloured in the final star – at the time rationalising like the book placement – obviously it was just an oversight on their part, and actually, it did look like there was a partial colouring in of the final star and ….

How low will I stoop in the quest to sell A Prickly Affair? Other top tips welcome!

The Tattoo – 2 – the video …

This is a little bit more sophisticated use of the web than usual for me … but I have the video of the tattooing – or rather 30 seconds or so … this was with the four pointed device that was used for shading and was, to use the language of the midwife, a little uncomfortable … but not so bad as to make my hand shake. So, if you are of a sensitive disposition, look away now …

The Tattoo …

To get to the ‘tattoo parlour’ – a temporary affair above the gallery, cordoned off by a red-rope barrier from the crowds, I was lead up the back stairs by Jai, master-mind of the madness that was about to begin. I was in the first batch of three – out of the 100 to be tattooed over the long weekend.

I think that Jai was probably more nervous than I was – so much to worry about, from media, to health – even so, there were a few butterflies tumbling as I walked out into the glare of the stage. I shared a quick smile with Kate, who was also about to get her first tattoo – before we took our places.

Many people I know already have tattoos, so the details will be well appreciated, but for me, this was a first, and probably last, opportunity to experience the art.

Simon – already fairly well covered with a wide array of images, was to be my artist. A quick shave of my lower left leg, a swab down with some fancy gel that allows the image on paper to transfer across to the skin … so that is how it is done … not just the freehand genius, they have help! And then, after attaching a fresh needle to the Heath Robinson tattooing machine, he began. He dipped the needle into a small pot of ink – preparing his quill.

As I had sat down I had realised there was quite a crowd come to see the start of the show, but found I was facing away from everyone. Not sure what it would have been like looking out at everyone.

I tried to relax, but there was a slight moment of bracing as the needle, buzzing like a gentle dentist’s drill, first touched my skin. Remarkably un-uncomfortable – though there was a strange taste in my mouth that started almost immediately and lasted for a couple of days.

It was such a benign experience that I picked up my camera and started taking photographs … proof of the calmness came in the steadiness of my hand – no flash and no shake. As my back was turned towards the crowd, the only way of finding out who was looking was by taking photographs over my shoulder – you can understand that I did not want to move too much while Simon was needling my skin.

And then it was all over – so quick. He had been dabbing away at flecks of blood and excess ink – along the way and the result looked remarkably complete. Yes, a little bruised, but otherwise fine. But that was not it … there was another component to the process – to be photographed with a 120 year old camera – big plate film, masses of detail I am sure. And not of the tattoo, but portraits of each of the ambassadors.

All 100 are done now – and I am hoping that we can arrange some sort of reunion – and as I discussed in a piece in the Guardian, possibly linking up with people doing this in other countries to present a block of wildlife ambassadors at the next meeting of the Convention on Biological Diversity.

So, to the healing – the instructions were simple – get hold of nappy cream and cling film … I was so disappointed that when I left the restaurant with a friend all the supermarkets were closed, I just wanted to imagine the look of confusion when all that was bought was beer, nappy cream and cling film.

After three days of that, it was on to coco butter – and there is general appreciation for the tattoo – in fact more than that. People are surprised at how cute it is … there is an association between tattoos and anger I think, so it is pleasing to have an image that subverts this. There is no attempt to repel with the hedgehog – it is there to attract.

Is that it? Will there be any more? Well, the night of the tattoo, back at my friend’s flat and her partner asks about my next book idea – the one where I track down people with animal passions similar to my own, but for different species … and Ian’s thought? “You are just on the hunt for the next tattoo, aren’t you?” Well, that has set something stirring in my mind …. will just have to wait and see.

At Last …

I have been putting an awful lot of work into raising awareness about my impending tattoo … in fact so much that I might have failed to mention it on the blog … Well, my first (and last) tatttoo is due to be applied to the lower part of my left leg at 8pm on Thursday 26th November … i.e. tomorrow. I thought that I should spread the word through the usual channels of the media – and so far it has been a bit of a damp squib, but then along came The Wellington News …. yippppeeeee …. who have faithfully copied a press release what I wrote. So please – help me spread the word. ExtInked, the project that is organising the tattooing, is just so inspirational.

And wish me luck tomorrow.

hx